life in slow motion

2010-02-09T10:56:00.000-05:00

Mash the &@#% Up!

Alright ya'lls. I have been a very bad blogger, so I wont be surprised if no one reads this anymore. I cant promise I'll be updating super often as I would like, but hopefully this post will be inspiration enough. And the topic of todays post will be dedicated to one important issue: mashups.

I cant get enough of them lately! There is a radio station in the DC area that plays mashups from like 10 to 12 on Saturday night that's pretty decent, but what started it all was Glee. My new fave show. Hands down.

In honor of my new found passion, I have compiled a few of my favorites! Enjoy!

2009-09-17T00:41:00.000-04:00

Hello world!

Life has been so busy but so good to me lately! I have several little treasures to share with ya'll, but first things first.

My new favorite obsession is textsfromlastnight. It is freaking amazing, people. Just as a little appetizer, here are a few of my favorites so far:

(260): I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
(260): Sorry- wrong number! :)

(334): The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.

(503): I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
(503): I am not joking.

(858): in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"

(323): You got in a fight last night?
(818): Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
(323): Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?

Sorry, some of them are a little grody, but i think that is part of the humor. That's right, I'm a dirty bird. :/

Anyways, hopefully, you will be seeing more of me on here! Tah tah.

2009-08-28T10:01:00.001-04:00

Sorry Gang! it has definitely been a while since my last post. I apologize for that. Sometimes life happens and I am unable to update. So in honor of the fact that I am not ignoring my blog anymore, I am going to reenter blogspace a little easy by updating you on my celebrity sighting list (as much much much has changed!)

1. Cato Caylin
2. Susan Sullivan {Greg's mother from Dharma and Greg}
3. Ron Jeremy
~~4. Jael {from America's Next Top Model}~~
4. John Ashcroft
5. Will.i.am
6. Danny Masterson
7. Barney Frank
8. Dennis Kucinich
9. Nancy Pelosi
10. Elizabeth Dole*
~~11. Spike {from Top Chef season 4}~~
11. Gerard Butler
12. Jeff Fahey {pilot from Lost}
13. Chaka Khan
~~14. entire cast of American Idol 2009~~
15. Serena Williams and her little dogs too!
16. former Senator Norm Coleman
17. Anna Kournikova
18. Nacho Figueras {polo player/Ralph Lauren model}
19. Carla Hall {from Top Chef season 5}
20. Matt Dillon
21. Keshia Knight Pulliam
22. Adrian Fenty {DC Mayor}

Who knew that moving to DC would make this list explode!

2009-05-27T23:02:00.007-04:00

The Foggy Clarity of it All

Last night while I was running across the street running errands for work I felt okay about living in DC for the first time. I know its not forever, but it is for now, and I totally want to embrace it and discover all there is to this city.

Speaking of which, I have been hearing about this boutique, Dekka, recently so I stopped by after work today to discover that they had very little men's clothing :( but very cool artwork for sale! :) I have been thinking recently about getting a nice poppy piece of art for my room. I tend to collect all things old and I need bold color and new, fresh design to blend with the old.

Speaking of which, I FINALLY went to the thrift store, and spent a quality amount of time there! (Im going to pull an Oprah here) I found some amazing things peoplllle! First off, I found some fun little things for a themed care package (i love that shit! I should start a care package business on the side!) that shall remain nameless because it is a sorpresa. Among the other things I found:

This Gin bottle had my name written all over it! I mean, its only my favorite hard liquor...I believe I uttered a holy shit or two upon finding it.

A little yellow basket to liven things up a bit and to coordinate with all the blue things going on in my life. I'll find something to store in it...

An amazing cylindrical lampshade (because the lamps were too damn 'spensive for what they were) to make a lampshade [pt. 1]

And finally, an amazing vase of which to make the base for the lamp [pt. 2]

Oh yeah...did I mention that everything was HALF OFF cause it was Memorial Day!? Its officially a new holiday tradition in the family, seeing as how I went with my brother (who found a vintage seltzer siphon!)

Anyways, sorry for the delay in blogging, but Ive been so damn busy! Working 2 jobs and trying to find time to hang out with a few friends. I mean, I havent been out in SOO long! Something that has GOT to change, and soon. Hope everyone is enjoying their spring/summer!

2009-05-18T18:49:00.001-04:00

So...Im updating ya'll!

My most sincere apologies for not blogging more, its just that, well, life has taken precedence over my blog and my internet usage. Huzzah! Anywho, I would like to take the time to catch up and tell you what's been on my mind.

I have been super busy working working working--to which I am totally grateful for. I overheard a woman on the street the other day say, "I'm really busy, but that is a great thing to be now..." I liked it. Anyways, I have been working full time for a boutique hotel in midtown and filling in from time to time at a friend's friend's boutique. I have also finally started to meet people in DC and it feels great. I finally see myself here, by no means long term, but for the time being, I am finally enjoying the city--exploring new areas, meeting new people, being more friendly and humanistic...

With the weather like it has been lately (NOT the rain and the chilliness today) I have been thinking a lot about summer in the city. I LOVE the idea. Its hot, its balmy (my least favorite weather descriptor), and people are still working hard, but they are starting to play hard too. Its like everyone gets frisky and even though they maintain productiveness in their everyday lives, they make more time to just sit on the patio and sip on {favorite summer beverage of choice} a nice gin cocktail.

Wanna know who inspired me to think about summer in the city?

her. and namely her mumu (and the attitude it packs).

For me, it isn't summer in the city until the lady in the mumu comes out. She's hot, quite possibly sweaty, and the city is her domain. She may be found wearing a head wrap with a cigarette hanging out of her mouth carrying a A/C window unit. She inspired me to put together a new playlist and to go explore more places to hang out and dance. These are just a few of the reasons why I love the lady in the mumu.

2009-04-04T22:54:00.000-04:00

So sorry for being a bad blogger. I have lots to update, such as a mini mini triathlon, trip to my homeland...ahem...MN, job stuff (ugggh), and wedding trip plan [changes]. Oh and, nostalgia--sleep overs, and well, being back in my homeland...laterrrrrr.

2009-03-26T22:45:00.003-04:00

Holy Shit Babies!

I mean, if it didn't look good enough...Arcade Fire? Spike Jonze? Screenplay by Dave Eggers? Music by Karen O?
YES PLEASE.

2009-03-24T18:26:00.000-04:00

win some+lose some

Man, life sure is a mixed bag. With good and bad so interwoven; a lot of times I feel like I am bipolar which is entirely a farce. Anyways, two of my pockets of sunshine have been these two songs. I can't get them out of my head!

numero uno:

Erlend (Ted&Francis Remix) - T...

and this little ditty:

Taken Away (Instrumental) - Di...

Man, when the sunshine is here, it's great!

2009-03-23T01:26:00.004-04:00

Bulletins, Buttons, and Beauty Queens

Here is the project I've been working on...er, rather, finished a while ago, that I have been meaning to post. I love retooling things for useful purposes. In college I found an old speaker in my friend's alley and turned it into a cabinet for candles, coins, and other nick-nacks. Here is my latest project:

before

after

sorry for the crappy pics, but y'know...so, the story. My sister used to work for redbull and was invited to this crazy house party and the guy was trying to hit it n quit it, so instead of letting him, she stole this picture he had on his porch...of Ms. America 1993, Leanza Cornett. I think it is the greatest thing she has stolen, so instead of having Leanza stare at me while I sleep, I turned her into a bulletin board! so anyhow...thats all I got! Lates!

2009-03-22T17:37:00.005-04:00

Huzzah!

New music! Yesss...thanks in part to new Yeah Yeah Yeahs, Karen, you're a creepy keeper! Man, I have so much that should be getting me down lately, but I am uncharacteristically chipper! Probably the weather...its like electricity pumping through my veins! Welp, I don't have anything right now...opf, I have to show you a little project I did a couple weeks ago...just need to snap a pic and it's yours! Welp, off to go running and bake a batch of cookies. Tah Tah!

I feel like this!

2009-03-20T02:37:00.001-04:00

Mortification

For the first time since having my blog, I have been avoiding it because I know what my next entry would behold. The latest revelation of unbalance in my life.

So, a friend of mine usually asks me if I want to drive up and stay with her when she goes to visit home in Long Island. This weekend was her birthday. Every time, until last weekend I have either been too frazzled or busy to go with her. But I have been getting increasingly frustrated with my life in DC and in general so I thought this might be a good opportunity for me to get away, meet a good friend's family, and come back feeling refreshed. I came back feeling a lot of things, refreshed certainly not among them. So we stay with a friend in Philly overnight and arrive in LI at about 3pm or whatever and proceed to meander, go out to dinner with her family, and then meet up with some of her friends later. We went to this really cool place called Painter's and although it felt a little like a frat house complete with LI meatheads and gotti hotties, it had amazing artwork and, um, amazing tasting drinks. And the plot thickens. So, my friend had warned me ahead of time that their drinks were toxic, but I hadn't had a really good drink in a while, so I decided to get the Painter's Punch. First (delicious) mistake. I was tipsy upon completion of one lousy drink! When I got to the table with my second drink...I had made it about half way and my long yoga arms fell wrong and knocked it over (probably for the better). I was feeling quite tipsy awkward and out of place so it was probably good that we left to go to some pub, Dublin Downs, I recall? It was even worse here, man am I a sore thumb or what? Anywho, after our pit stop we approach the bar and get a round of shots. At this point I am still aware of what I can handle and tell myself that I can have one more drink. So I get a Stella and close my tab, oh yeah, I had told myself that I wasn't going to drink beer that night...second mistake. So, I was drunk at this point, but totally coherent and had I not accepted the following drink I probably would have been fine, but I reached out for that third mistake and partook all too passively.
Blackness.
I awoke the next morning soaking wet in the my friend's parents guest room. Wondering why I am soaked and with what I catch a wiff. Vomit...and my mouth drops. what the hell happened? I am thinking. So, I change my clothes and go back to sleep, too embarrassed to think about what potentially went down. I wake up again at 11 to my friends mother baking her birthday cake (which I was supposed to help her with). I text my friend and ask what happened last night and she gets the scoop, to my dismay. It appears that when we left the pub, not only did I puke before getting into the car, in my friend's friend's car, and getting out of the car, but I puked all over my friend's bedroom floor. Did I mention that the Painter's Punch was red? Yeah, kool-aid red. Her mom woke up and tried to get up the stain to no avail. A couple questions I now ponder:

1) How absolutely selfish and self-centered can I be?
2) I come to celebrate my friend's birthday with her family and completely and literally disrespect them like this?
3) How irresponsible am I? Could I not have been the person who was in control of the situation and look out for other people?

My friend's parents said they were not angry and that they were not going to let this distract from the birthday celebration weekend, but I could not escape the lingering truth that I ruined not only my friend's birthday weekend, her parent's carpet, and other things; but I tainted her familial relationships somehow. Ahh.

To say the least, I was and still am mortified and disgusted with myself and my deplorable actions. Where does the damage control even begin?

In the spirit of this blog post, please visit fmylife.com so that you may forget what you have just read here. No comments necessary.

P.S. is anyone else getting sick of the music here? I'll start working on a new playlist soon enough.

2009-03-14T15:34:00.002-04:00

Oh man...NY has already started with a bang...the most awkward bang possible. More later.

2009-03-12T08:53:00.003-04:00

I know, I know. I need to update. I am currently struggling with putting it all out there. In blog life and real life. Perhaps, I should work on the real life part first...being that it is more pertinent, and then blog life will follow suit. Annyways...I am going to New York for a very inneresting weekend no doubt and will likely blog about some aspect about it when i get back! Fare the well!

PS i love the words that google word verification comes up with!

2009-03-07T19:29:00.001-05:00

It is SO nice out! I am just squealing with delight (on the inside of course--NEVER display emotion!)!!!

2009-03-07T15:53:00.006-05:00

Random...

...so I am currently catching up on the Top Chef Reunion that I missed this past week and I flipped the channel during one of the commercials and there was an informercial for Curve Control Jeans on the next channel. Holy hell! I did not know Mom Jeans were still being quasi-legitimately sold. Here is one of their testimonials.

I'm not trying to be a whiney bitch or anything, I just can't believe that stuff like this is even marketable anymore. Particularly after SNL has made it so blatantly obvious circa 2002.

That's all, just a random blurb. Happy saturday--hope you are enjoying the unseasonable but wonderful weather!

2009-03-06T04:53:00.010-05:00

Insomniacs Theater

What better time to update my blog than when I am lying awake at 5am! My sleep patterns have been INSANE lately! I seriously need to get some melatonin in my system, cause I don't see this panning out too well :( I have a couple things for ya'll:

1) I have been a baking fiend lately. I suppose that is what happens when you have a brother and a dad born on the same date (and when you are the only baking-oriented person in the family). Earlier this week I made a grapefruit cake just for shits. Okay, maybe I shouldn't refer to those things together...my baad. Anyways, I just LOVE grapefruit and had more than a few to try it out with! The cake was delicious! It was a poundesque cake with a grapefruit cream cheese frosting. Next time, I will definitely skip that frosting and switch to a grapefruit glaze or a simple, sweet cream whip. And tonight in honor of my brother, (who dies when he eats java chip ice cream) I made a java chip ice cream cake complete with a homemade brownie crust! It was also delicious, my friends! Now if I can keep up with my exercises...check!

Next up: (even simpler) chocolate malts, because they are my dad's favorite!

2) I admit it; I started reading Twilight. The verdict thus far: I like it! Of course, I AM a sucker for all things pop culture and a ginormous fan of the Harry Potter series (duh!). I find that the author has a strange way of saying things/phrasing every once in a while, and I have found several errors, but the way she describes the pacific northwest is the best! It makes me excited to go to Portland this summer! One of my bests is getting married there this summer and while I am there staying with the best people ever (Queen Tina and The Bear) we are going to have a Ryan Gosling movie marathon because we have decided, particularly upon seeing his last two films--Half Nelson and Lars and the Real Girl, that we will see anything that he is in. I mean c'mon, remember when he was Young Hercules??? Wow, this has become quite the tangent. Twilight is good...check!

3) As promised, here is my new (and first) nephew! Rakasta El...but don't quote me on the name...he doesn't have a birth certificate yet because he was born at home in a tub! Yep...he's a granola baby, and he is beautiful! I can't wait to see him grow up! Plus, he has the BEST wardrobe ever, and so long as I can keep sending stuff, he should remain in tip top :) I mean, he has a little leather aviator jacket...bomb.com! Man, he is a stinkin' cutie even though he cries all the time! If you couldn't tell he has quite an interesting mother...naming him Rakasta, not wanting to set him on any semblance of a schedule, and having a home birth with a dull-ah! He will sure grow up in an interesting home and I cant wait to whisk him away and try on the uncle role. So exciting!

P.S. I have been obSESSED with Walking On a Dream by Empire of the Sun, which can be heard in my playlist below. Sorry if you have already heard it 1,000 times, but what can I say...its spring and I found it inspiring! Hasta!

2009-02-28T16:31:00.003-05:00

So, I have been helping a (best) friend with her wedding invitations for the big day this summer and have been looking up things all over the place! I gotta admit, I love it--there is so much creativity involved. So I have been looking everywhere from etsy to marthastewart to find helpful tidbits and inspiration for her. So here is a hodgepodge of things that have been inspiring about the whole thing and/or she is using in her wedding:

her idea for table center pieces...by martha

stamp for rsvp postcards

cool looking programs...gotta love typewriters

one of the invitations they're looking at

who knew paper bags could be so classy?

the victorian venue itself!

dafting on the dance floor...need i say more?

On a completely different side note, DC is finally offering some good dance parties tonight! I will be at all of them! I have been craving dancing so bad lately! Laterrrrr.

2009-02-26T17:27:00.001-05:00

Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger

I have been doing a really good job of running and swimming lately (nearly everyday). I see improvements just about everyday in distance and endurance. BUT i still feel as though I have yet to pass through that threshold...arg, its so tough! PLUS it is suppose to get cold again next week...this all makes me very sad :( Mental toughness is a real barrier for me...Anywho, a couple things I look forward to: I am picking up my road bicycle tomorrow from the shop, (she needed a tune-up) she is a seafoam green, vintage beaut!; in addition, I am finally going to go out and dance this weekend! Oh man, I have wanted to shake it for a while now, and it is finally going to happen! I am clearly excited, but I am apprehensive to drink a lot considering all of the exercising I have been doing...damn, its like all for nothing...Eh, I will just have to feel the burn the following day :|

One of these days I am going to get my ass to scan all the old family photos I've been meaning to and blog all about it. Get it!

2009-02-23T22:05:00.004-05:00

Guess what day it is??

National Banana Bread Day!

How did I know this?

A tweet from Foodimentary told my this great tidbit. This is the full-length, unabashed blog.

So here is what I did about it!

Et Voila! Pain de banane! In regular and with a Cashew Streusel.

P.S. one of my fails is that I can't take good pictures. It is why I usually leave that to other people...

2009-02-22T17:46:00.002-05:00

In Honor of the Oscars being tonight...here is that damned song that E! keeps playing with their Red Carpet Coverage:

Untouched - The Veronicas

There, now it should be out of your head...or at least mine. Lates!

2009-02-22T14:23:00.003-05:00

List of tabs I have open in Safari right at this moment in time:

-facebook

-playlist.com

-ny fashion week

-paper source (not only an obsession of mine, but I'm helping a friend with wedding stuff)

-gmail

-Urban Outfitters

-blogger

-mutha fuckin' marthastewart.com (" ")

Speaking of Martha Stewart...has anyone seen that show Whatever Martha on FLN? It is SO good...although I get the feeling the co-host, Jennifer Koppelman-Hutt is a really big liar. Just an inkling. Alexis Stewart, on the other hand, is the best...and a cougar. I said it.

Peaces!

2009-02-19T22:32:00.002-05:00

Sorry everything is a mess here. I'm still trying to clean it up but I have one question. Is the header all messed up other than being off centered?

2009-02-16T22:55:00.001-05:00

Running Status: dismal

Dear Dears:

I am very disappointed that I have not been sticking with my training schedule. I need a boost...already. Why is it so effing difficult for me to get into shape? or to, at very least, run regularly? Again, I express disappointment, but then again, tomorrow is a new day! I am going to rise in the morning and schedule things and accomplish. I need to make some kind of commitment and stick with it...even if said commitment is a relationship (((gasp))). Oh, and I need a wing man. Thanks blogger.

Sincerely,
Kent

PS, I saw Gran Torino tonight with Domin, it was worth a few good laughs.

2009-02-14T01:17:00.008-05:00

Today was a pretty good day that started quickly going south. Eventually I got really frustrated, so I made a trip to wholefoods and bought food for 1) my parents 30th anniversary dinner and 2) macaroni and cheese. Might I add that that mac and cheese was the best mac and cheese I have ever made?? Gruyere+Cheddar+Asiago=Everything is gunna be juuust fine.

30th Anniversary Dinner Menu:

Arugula, Roasted Tomatoes, Asiago Dressing

Cheddar Cheese Biscuits

Twice-Baked Potatoes, Cheddar, Chives

Asparagus, Lemon Pepper

Filet, Caramelized Onions, Compound Thyme Butter

Creme Brulee, Raspberries

K, so, change of plans. I don't think I'll be running in the Kentucky Derby miniMarathon BUT that doesn't mean I am not running any races! Here's my little line-up: in March I am running a lil 5k in Manassas (who names a city Man Asses, seriously?) with my brother and mom, should be fun; in April I am tentatively doing a mini triathlon in Bumpass (get this--the race is called the Rumpass in Bumpass, how could I resist?). So that is the line-up, now alls I hafta do is get that bike conditioned and register. I even bought a bunch of running gear and a real (tight spandex) bathing suit in order to make this a reality...but I mean I've worn crazier so whatever...

Get it!

PS, I am going to be posting pics of a little project I'm doing...in addition to all the other photos I have yet to post. Look alive!

2009-02-11T13:15:00.003-05:00

In my attempt to be more holistic I added twitter and facebook badges to clutter up my usually minimal blog. It's silly, I know, but I force myself to think about my whole person all the time...even when adding applications to my various networks--just a little insight into my crazy little brain. In any case, I will try to make it look more aesthetically pleasing and minimal later. Oh PS, I am thinking about registering for the Kentucky Derby Festival miniMarathon in Louisville this April. Thoughts? It would be my first marathon of any kind, but maybe registering would be the fire that my ass needs to get motivated in life! I need to decide soon though cause I would only have 72 days to train for a 13.1 miler...Bah! I'll be back soon!

2009-02-06T23:25:00.032-05:00

We're here!

Standing at the South Gate...for hours.

Although we were this close to the platform...

...we opted to watch the jumbotron.

Though I loathed him on Top Chef, Spike makes a mean portobello burger!

What a {cold/historic/annoying/wortheverysecondofit} day!

2009-02-06T02:04:00.003-05:00

I found my new obsession in the form of polygamy! Woohoo! And all this after a great couple of conversations with Kristi about men and their [blanket statement] inability to be monogamous. Not all, but most.

I just cannot peel myself away from this show!

I wasn't going to break the news until I had photos to prove it, but I have had the immense pleasure to hang out with my spankin new nephew, Rakasta (not to be confused with Rastafarian or Chupacabra) lately and it has been great! Although he seems to cry every time I hold him. Big time Momma's boy juuuust like me.

Photoblogs to ensue: Family through the decades, Inauguration of BHO, and baby Raka.

2009-01-24T12:34:00.001-05:00

Updated List: Celebrity Sightings in Chronological Order

1. Cato Caylin
2. Susan Sullivan {Greg's mother from Dharma and Greg}
3. Ron Jeremy
~~4. Jael {from America's Next Top Model}~~
4. John Ashcroft
5. Will.i.am
6. Danny Masterson
7. Barney Frank
8. Dennis Kucinich
9. Nancy Pelosi
10. Elizabeth Dole*
~~11. Spike {from Top Chef season 4}~~
11. Gerard Butler

*almost forgot about this babe!

2009-01-23T09:50:00.003-05:00

Welp...assuming I can find a ride to Philadelphia today, I am on my way to CA! I got a nonrev ticket from my brother's flight attendant friend anddd since all the airlines overbook their flights over inauguration week to make money {dont get me started} all the flights are still overbooked...fts. But hey, I guess that's what you get for buying cheap tickets, and it is likely the last time I ever do it. I might update from CA, in fact I probably will, I just don't want to make any promises. Happy trails!

2009-01-20T18:40:00.003-05:00

What. A. Day!

I have had an wonderful wonderful day...obviously! I started out early, but later than I expected. Yes, I headed to the Capitol along with everyone else and their mother to witness history unfold before our eyes. It was a day of numbing cold (my feet specifically) and worth every inch of lifeless extremity in me. {I gained feeling back in my toes, so all is well!} I watched on the Capitol grounds as Obama ushered us into a new era and look forward to what this new era holds for us! I was so proud of him as his family as he spoke to our nation...and his sweet little girls greeting the world with their dimples and tidy ringlets. While I was enamored by the Obama administration I was appalled at how rude everyone in the crowd was! People were leaving when Obama was speaking. Seriously people, what the fuck? The new president is delivering a speech, everyone is trying to pay attention not get out of your way, AND you waiting for HOURS to see this...I do not understand. After Obama gave his speech, it was like a mass exodus, the diaspora even. How do people wait in a line that is 3-4 hours long and then not sit through the poetry and benediction. I was cold too, {this post may be f bomb heavy, but deserved} mother fuckers. Those rude people could not take away my or anybody else's happiness. Me and Justin stayed for a minute until some of the crowds relented and walked up Independence and Pennsylvania Ave, away from the White House mind you, to go to Good Stuff. It was far easier to walk in the street than the sidewalk at that point cause no cars were allowed anyways. We waited in the warm line for our food while Spike worked expo...good work! I got the shroom burger and fries. SO GOOD although I felt instantaneously toxic from the greasy fries...what the hell, its obama day, right? I came home and took a nap as I barely slept last night. Now, I am tired but SO READY for the night that lies ahead. Here's to you Mr. President!

2009-01-17T07:13:00.001-05:00

So, I kind of caved...I really hate being too interconnected with technology {even though my macbook is fused to my hip}. So it is especially shameful for me to have made a twitter account. Yes, it may or may not be true...Anyways, I am always the one saying, "I don't want to access email on my phone, I just want time to myself where I am unreachable." Times they are a' changing. I am having second thoughts. I mean the whole idea is I am reachable if and when I want to be reached. I just dont want to be jaded into thinking that I NEED to be connected to facebook/email/texting at every point during the day like some people I know{...ahem}. So here I am bitching about it on my blog. I am such a contradiction. My piles of controlled mess. My laid-back pickiness. Anywho, I love consolidating things and twitter seems like a great streamlining agent. I will let you all know how it works out. Still working on a more serious blog...just have to scan some stuffff. Hasta la pasta.

2009-01-12T11:53:00.003-05:00

AHHH! So many secret things! In my world secrets are synonymous with spring, so I don't ever care about what that little groundhog sees. I suppose it has something to do with that internal buzz that gets going when the weather gets a little nicer, and well I just start to get frisky. Anyways, I guess for me spring is coming a little early! I have been working on a REAL entry, rather than these trite little blurbs, so it should be up soon!

2009-01-08T21:45:00.001-05:00

A series of fragmented thoughts:

Lately, I feel like I am becoming a different person.
I am a ball of suppressed emotion.
I feel so on the verge of change that I don't exactly know how to feel, other than awkward, which is how I normally roll.
I am so terribly unmotivated in my life right now.
I am generally okay and maybe a bit queasy about it all.
I am REALLY tempted to stay in LA when I go visit this month. No, I have to have some sort of plan of action.
Fuck!

2009-01-05T23:58:00.000-05:00

I feel so fortunate to have such good friends!

To say the least, I had a great time in Grand Rapids.

2008-12-28T14:52:00.004-05:00

I go back to work tomorrow! Ahhhh! I really do not want to...but, I am restless and so it will probably be good for me to do something, anything! Seeing as I am back to it tomorrow this is a perfect time to reflect on this break/christmas/etc.

First off, I find it so strange that I had a christmas break this year. I am no longer in college and yet I still had a lot of time off from work, so strange...government employees get every stinkin' holiday off, even the semi-obscure ones that people don't get off anymore such as Veterans Day, or VD as I like to call it. Anywho, back to my original stream of consciousness. Christmas break, although strange, was great! My family got together for a little bit (but not too much), and we even went to see Handel's Messiah at the Strathmore, which was awesome! I love holiday plays/musical events/whatnot, and it was great because for some reason we felt like such a family that night. It is so weird how a stereotypical event is all it takes to make you feel like you fit right into that stereotyped life. Anyways, my family is not big on Christmas anymore, they say it is too commerical. How original right? So this year i grew a backbone and said, well if you all think its so commercial and wrong then why don't you do something to fight it? Instead of just sitting around this year can't we go cook breakfast at a soup kitchen or something? So, it took and we doled out homemade cinnamon rolls and coffee around town to people on the streets. It was neat, next year it will be a tight operation if I have anything to do with it. I love making things well-oiled machines. When we got home, mom and I started cooking christmas dinner and then it was time for presents, which was also awesome because it wasn't like childhood when there was an explosion of presents under the tree BUT it also wasn't like last year when no one gave anything to each other. It was the perfect balance. Justin got me a straight edge paper cutter, so now there is just no excuse to not open a card making business! Opf, and the best gift I got? Right here folks.

And how in the big blue world could I forget christmas dinner? It was amazing! My family eats Indian curry every Christmas and there is an interesting story behind it. It all starts before I was born. My grandpa died in a car accident in 1984 and the christmas after he died everyone was moping around my g-ma's house and they said, well what would David want to eat? And ever since we have been eating his favorite, Indian curry, every year. Yep, we're traditional.

So, if you haven't noticed, I am a complete momma's boy. So the highlights of this little christmas vaca were definitely being around her. At the beginning of break we made cookies together which was awesome. I think she is why I want to go to culinary school so bad. I have been that kid squatting on a chair watching her cook and bake through wooden dowels since I was a little kid. Also, yesterday I was explaining that I need to get out of this city and away from family so that I can build confidence and independence and responsibility and she told me to go when I felt I needed to, but it wasn't going to stop her from enjoying having me while she does. What a lady.

That's about it folks and friends. I am headed to Michigan on Friday, yipes! I haven't been 'home' in like 4 years or something...ahhh!

2008-12-15T01:06:00.002-05:00

I miss friend, people, ANYone! DC is a very individualistic city and I cannot stand it. There are certain things that I REALLY like about DC, such as its public transportation and its bar culture but there is even more that I LOATHE about it and about me being here. I feel like my life has been truncated and I am more timid and more of a hermit than ever...not to mention everyone is TOTALLY boring here! That said, I am already ready for a change. I went out on friday night with a good friend and drank WAAY too much. Oops! I felt really shitty (not hungover) about it the next day. Anyways, the good news is I found a couple new pubs that I really really like. So huzzah! Next time I go, I will drink less ;). In other news...I am done with my internship soon! I only have like a week and a half or something to go. I am excited to be done! Dont get me wrong , I am liking it and I have learned about myself and others, but I am excited to stop hiding who I am (a flaming liberal...whaaat?) The problem therein is a job after my internship...what the hell is my problem? I was supposed to take time during my internship to find another job! Here I am 2 weeks out and I have not looked nearly hard enough. Yet, I keep telling myself, "oh well, I dont really want to work anyways." Who the hell says that to themselves? Its so bad! Anyways, a few MORE goodies: I am thinking about planning trips to both MI and CA in the very near future! I am thinking about seeing friends in MI the weekend after New Years (right after my internship ends) and then to CA following the inauguration to see my baby momma sister and my new nephew, Rakasta. WEIRD, everything about it. But my mom doesn't really feel comfortable going alone, so what the hell right? I am in the perfect position to be able to go. Plus this way I think I will be able to check the prospects of moving down there later in the new year...yay! I cant wait to have more than a handful of quasi-good friends in the near future! Well friends, I should probably go to bed...I feel a little like Im going to vom. Have a better night than I am likely to have!

2008-11-29T14:32:00.004-05:00

You Don't Have to Take My Word For It

For hors d'oeuvres I would like to say that Thanksgiving was great! There was the usual rushing and cooking frustration that accompanies every meal every year. I'm just glad that said frustration never ruins thanksgiving. I made all my desserts and they went over well, even though the caramel apple pie was like pie soup...it needed a little more time. There were these teenagers at turkey day (my aunt's friend's kids) and they just ate all of the desserts up. I felt awesome...which is why I feel a lot in common with Maggie Gyllenhall's character in Stranger Than Fiction.

Now to the goods. Today I have been feeling very nostalgic. Nostalgic about childhood not people that I miss, which is what I generally feel nostalgic about. Earlier today I was looking up all the books that I used to read when I was wee. Rumpelstiltskin, Lon Po Po, The Castle in the Attic, etc. etc. I have also been watching episodes of reading rainbow, which is AWESOME. Does anyone remember that episode where he goes to a diner and learns dinerese (short ordering)? Its pretty much my favorite episode. Then my thoughts traveled my daily routines in kindergarten. I was an AM kinder so I would get home every day just in time to watch sesame street. My mom would make me a bologna and cheese sandwich with a glass of milk on these awesome green tupperware trays kinda like this.

Sigh, my mom is the greatest. This is strange, but thinking back to all of these little things makes me very proud of my heritage. Who would think that reminiscing about puke green tupperware and bologna and cheese would do so? Well, I take pride in being midwestern and quirky and furthermore I am so grateful for my family and my upbringing. I just wouldn't have it any other way.

2008-11-25T23:39:00.001-05:00

Lists make me feel like I am friends with Ghostwriter. Hence, I love 'em.

I am so tired! I never sleep at night and wake up for work at like 7...its like high school all over again, except the responsibilities are greater and i get paid. The good news is that I have been so busy at work that I haven't even had time to remember just how tired I am! I have been working on contact lists since last week. Seems like an easy task aye? Well, right. I had 6 legislative assistants to get info from, compile it in one source, format that source (commonly named excel; I like to call it satan), and then I am told that all that work was for nothing...in the nicest possible way, so these past two days I have been attaching contacts to emails, dragging and dropping until the list is complete. One of the lists is complete, shit. I have to scramble to get it done during the half day tomorrow...THEN I had to call all the republican senator offices to make sure that we had all their information correct. It may very well sound like I am bitching, but alas, I prefer being busy and am grateful for it, nuances is all...

anywho, now to the real reason I am blogging tonight. I cant wait to begin baking tomorrow! I am responsible for dessert on Turkey so here is my schedule:

Wednesday after work:

1) Hit the grocery store and obtain the remaining supplies necessary.

2) Put together two pie shells (one pecan cinnamon, one regular type)

3) Refrigerate those bitches overnight.

Thursday Morning (no, not Tuesday morning or that horribly raspy voice):

1) Whip up my bomb-ass molasses cookies and refrigerate

2) Roll out and bake the pie shells

3) Bake the cookies

4) Mix together the pie fillings

5) Bake and bake

6) Shazaam!

Silly me forgot to tell you what pies I am making...Pumpkin Pie Brulee and Caramel Apple/Pear Pie. G'night babies!

2008-11-16T23:25:00.004-05:00

Tally Ho!

I am feelin' pretty good right now even though I am already up a little bit too late, didn't finish my laundry for the week, and have a hugemongo zit on my face; there are many reasons for this. This week was pretty damn good.
Earlier on in the week was regulario, but I am hanging out with friends and doing more fun things more often now, so it's nice. PSHhh, wait! I had tuesday off! that was wonderful, bought a new shirt...Thanks vets! But seriously, thanks cause I know I couldn't serve our country as well as you all do. Wednesday was pure goodness cause I went to a show! Complete with a pre party and the beer was a-flowin! So I drank lots of Blue Moon and Stella Artois while standing and bending my knees every-so-often to the beats of Diplo. After the pre party we went to this great place called Black Cat which had a huge venue upstairs kind of like RNR hotel except opposite floors. Diplo was...eh, disappointing. He was so freakin good in Vegas when dos equis went to see justice. This time he was flat, but i was totally tipsy so I had a great time--Best Part of the night: A man in a pizza suit jumped off the stage and rode the people wave...then a couple of minutes later the pizza made its way back to the stage...with no one inside of it! it was so funny. Anyways, the opener was surprisingly awesome--No Age. Anywho, I was a zombie on thursday and dragged all through the day, but it was worth it. Friday was good as well! I was tired again, but who cares right? Its friday! anyways, had the longest tour of my life and got to go into the new capitol visitor center, the house floor, and into the democratic cloakroom and the speaker's lounge. THEN, I was supposed to leave early to fetch my mom from the airport at 3:30 BUT at 2:30 our hall went into lockdown because of a suspicious substance in the hallway. It sucked that I wasnt able to pick her up, but exciting nonetheless. Then, I caught the tail-end of Rue 14's (domin's employer) grand opening shindig which was cool and then we went to a great pub and got drinks! so great! I didn't really do anything else this weekend except rake leaves today, which was awesome!
I'm feelin' pretty darn tootin. I also have much to look forward to this week! Tomorrow while at work I am going to be updating my resume and sending it out a couple of places that peaked my interest (hopefully I will have interviews soon!) and then on wednesday the House reconvenes for lame duck session which will likely mean that I will have more interesting errands to run in the capitol. Anyways, I'm tired and cold and should go to bed. Hope you enjoy the music, I can't get enough of Blonde Redhead lately...night-o!

2008-11-08T12:22:00.010-05:00

Its a beautiful day in the neighborhood. Seriously. If i had a camera I would be taking lots of pictures of all the various colored leaves falling from the trees. But what is better, and what I cannot even attempt to portray is the smell that falling leaves has. Every time the wind blows and wafts the scent of crunchy leaves my brain pretty much transports me back to when I was 10 raking leaves and stuffing them into pumpkin bags. That said, fall is insanely beautiful out here! I wish I could share it with everyone. I do not ever remember all of the colors, deep reds, chartreuse, golden yellow, and your standard burnt siena.

My internship is going great! I am finally feeling more comfortable around the office, which is good because Congress is going to reconvene in a week or so. The staff assistant (my first boss) was sick the past three days so I got to play pretend like I was the staff assistant! It was great! Often times in the office they wont have me do certain things because it is a) easier for them to do it themselves or b) the only thing they have going on in their cubicle and they don't to give the job away (totally understandable). That said, I am excited for it to be more busy on the hill! Can't wait to run the good errands. Republican cloakroom or office supply store...I'll take a trip to the cloakroom please. On another related note, I need to really start looking for jobs so that I am not one of the 6.5% of Americans that is unemployed...and then I would like to pay off some debts and ~~forgive my debtors~~ save up to move back to CA to live the dreammm. I have been thinking about if I found a job or was offered one on the hill if I would go for it. Firstly, it would have to be in at least a moderate office. But I am not sure that I would take it. Being around politics all day long is exhausting. Its important but draining and I fail to understand how so many staffers continue subjecting themselves to misery. I think working in a district office would probably be way better and more laid back. Everyone is so uptight in DC. And that is why I dont like it here. It is a great place to visit, and it is getting less uptight, it just can't be helped. It is a part of DC's nature. But back to my point, what is my resume going to look like? "So you mean to tell me that you went from being an intern on capitol hill to working at a clothing retailer?"

"Yes, sir, that is what I mean to tell you."

"Thank you for your time, but University of Michigan is looking for more qualified candidates."

I can see it now. Enough of the Debbie-Downerness, which speaking of, SNL has been spot on the past couple months. It doesn't get any better than the Crazy McCain Lady. And that's all from me!

Welp, now that it is 1 o'clock I think I will force myself out of bed to do some yoga and watch Barefoot Contessa. Adios Mijos!

2008-10-18T13:22:00.003-04:00

This is one of those posts in which I need to hear feedback from all you people.

Well, the hopefully inevitable happened yesterday at work. Well, first, I actually had work to do, which was unusual but great. Mainly though, I was asked who I was voting for in this election...I just figured they all assumed I would be voting for McCain (which is simply not true but Im not going to try to convince them otherwise). I was stunned and I tried sooo freaking hard to be honest, but I wanted to be able to continue my internship as well. So I faked it, I said I wasn't sure yet (not true) and then I proceeded to say things that would make them more comfortable like, "I'm actually more of a moderate. My family is all over the map politically, so I suppose it makes sense," and, "If I would have voted in 2004, I would have voted for Bush cause Kerry was weaksauce" (which is why I am glad that I didn't vote--I left that part out). Ugh, they were shocked and I felt so freaking uncomfortable! What I really wished I would have said was, "I'm a moderate, but I do not feel like it is my place to talk about my political convictions because while I am interning it is my job to assist Rep. Tiahrt in any way possible to assist his constituents. And I have looked at his stances and generally agree with him or at least understand and respect his point of view." I think I am going to start looking for a job just in case things get harder for me at work. I am going to be watching carefully to see if people start to treat me any differently and if so, I will try to make them understand me...but if it just gets difficult, I will try to get interviews. After all, the day I started the Staff Assistant told me that they wanted me to work through December but if I had job interviews or got another job that would be just fine and they would understand. Freaking A man, it is so damn silly! Before this even happened I have been noticing that I do not really want anything to do with this, it is mostly corrupt and if you are one of the people who are honest and equitable your life is basically hell. I would love to work with the old folks, yup. U of M, I'm yours if you'll have me.

[Biggest sigh of the century]

2008-10-05T21:16:00.002-04:00

So, here I lie. On my bed, thinking about the laundry that I have to finish among other life quandaries. This internship is very interesting thus far! First, I am interning for a very conservative congressman from the midwest and I swing in the other direction. Not that I am necessarily liberal, but kind of. Anyways, it will be my attempt to be moderate after this internship, which I think will prove easy when surrounded by all the conservative minds around me. So far, I have learned the basics, like logins and how to file things in the database and such. By far one of the most interesting insights I have learned thus far is the life of a major political figure. I do not envy it one bit! The government definitely provides for their people (insurance, salary, etc.) but what is the point if you don't get to enjoy it? Man, these people are in DC all week without their families making decisions that they don't want to make. Then, on top of that they (representatives anyway) have to campaign every two years! As if you don't get attacked by your constituents regularly, you have cutting campaigns against you every other year. craziness, people, craziness. Well, I am there to help in any way with no objections though; it's kinda what I signed up to do. I am having trouble understanding the dress code. Strange aye? You'd think I would understand it pretty well. It is a dark suit, shirt, and tie on days when congress is in session, and when they aren't meeting slacks and a shirt (and tie for some). Fridays are supposed to be dress down -- slacks and a dress shirt. However, this Friday (which would typically be casual) was a important house session -- the bailout vote. So everyone was dressed up in suits. I am so confused, could someone just clear things up for me? I think that is all for now. I wish you could all see how ridiculously square I have to dress for work...its crazy. G'night friends.

2008-09-30T22:49:00.002-04:00

Well, here i am on the eve of my first day of interning with a U.S. Congressman! Wow. I have a feeling I am in for it--in a good way. I haven't been challenged enough in my life post-graduation. Yes, life has thrown some curve balls my way, but I have not been challenged enough. It will be nice to get into a quasi-career and be busy for once! I know that I will have a lot to learn and I think I am ready for it. Last week [as you can see] I was feeling incredible nervous about this opportunity. I also felt that this internship was for college students and that I was just late in the game. Well, my sentiments have surely changed. I do not feel near as nervous and further feel like this is a great opportunity, yet a challenging one. Well friends, wish me luck (and energy...you know how tired and lethargic I can get...)! Fare the well!

2008-09-24T09:55:00.001-04:00

I have been somewhat more productive the past couple of days. I washed my sheets, a trend that I think will become weekly. I did my laundry. I went running before noon! This was my favorite feat because it felt so damn good to have already exercised and still had the rest of my day to do whatever. I chose to go to IKEA with domin and help her select a desk for her new apt. It was great! I mean, yes, I am significantly less stimulated these days, but it was nice, we had several laughing fits and it almost resembled old times. There was even fro-yo involved, but it was far too sweet for my liking, holy crap, I AM turning into a grandpa, I even made oatmeal raisin cookies the other night! That is the last bit of my happiness, I am starting to eat healthy again! I even gave my mom a free lesson about which yogurt is good and which is bad! She must be so happy to have be back again...

shit.

Onto other things...I start my internship in one week folks, and I'm not gunna lie, I'm a bit nervous [Felix the cat eyes]. I mean, I don't think I should be. After all, this is an internship that mostly college students do. It will most likely consist of capitol tours and answering phones, maybe a little research here and there and filing, woohoo! I just hope hope hope I get paid a lil bit. If not, I'm fucked (pardon e moi, its my new word of choice) because student loans ensue! Ahhhh! Maybe I can just request a $700 billion bailout for me and my poor student loans. It is just going to be strange being a normal human being again. I have lazed around this summer, so this will be a good refresher course on being a real boy/man-child.

Adios amigos (yeah, thats three languages in one post)!

PS, I have been so totally into the 90s lately it is absurd. I have been watching Beethoven, Mrs. Doubtfire, Sleepless in Seattle, and the likes like a fiend! Also, the Spin Doctors make me feel really good right now. How bizarre, how bizarre!

2008-09-18T19:48:00.000-04:00

[I should be running right now, but i have been encouraged to update more often, so for now, this will take precedence.]

I have finally landed an internship on capitol hill! I am just happy to have something going for me. I am forcing myself to feel lucky because not only am I not from Kansas (the Reps. district home) but I am no longer a college student, for whom the internships are usually given to. But still, there is apprehension of the normal kind (don't catch on, not good enough, etc.) and of the abnormal kind (why would i take this internship if I want to go into long-term care, am i this concerned with public policy, etc.). I suppose an internship is by definition a learning experience, so I hope to figure out those conundrums.

I keep saying that I am pretty much over the fact that I am no longer in college, but let's face it; I most definitely am not.

Lately, I have been feeling so strange [it is fall, and I tend to be more sensitive and melancholy in general]. At first I was feeling nostalgic and missed it quite simply. Then I tried to translate those feelings into real life, but it is hard to simply push through the feelings when your friends are pursuing such different endeavors as yourself in addition to life not proving to be as ideal as previously thought. Basically, I just don't like it when I am not on the same page as other people, particularly my own friends. To date, I am feeling as if I missed a portion of my life, as if since graduation someone accidentally stepped on the remote fast forwarded my life and livelihood or something to that effect. I feel old and that is just not right. I am too young to feel this old. I need to be more carefree, but how does one do that while interning on the hill? Life should indeed feel fast for this 22 year old, but not like it is escaping me. I just have so many hesitations in life that it is shameful. Perhaps this is my way of dealing with the fact that I made some decisions too hastily upon graduation...If my decisions are doing to be hasty, I want them to take me on an adventure, to make me live fast, and to absorb new and strange life experiences. I don't want hasty decision making to end tragically, with me reverted back to a younger, less confident, more immature version of myself, lacking any adventure. I need to get back to my own quirky, kentish frame of mind. I do not want to lose myself or who I am. I need growth and learning and adventure above all else. I need my vitality back.

Honestly, these posts appear to be downers, and past posts have indeed been that, but I am feeling decent about life in general. I have escaped from the darkness of my mid-summer sentiments. This is just a testament to feeling like my life has been lost in translation. It's grey, it's melancholy, it's not very exciting, but you better fucking believe it's real. This is me getting back on track.

2008-09-03T17:50:00.001-04:00

I am SO unhappy with just about every aspect of my life right now! I am just trying my hardest to keep looking up and make things work out...

2008-08-22T11:31:00.000-04:00

Ugh. Life on the East Coast has been disappointing. I now know why people were questioning my move. Don't get me wrong, it hasn't been all bad, but very disappointing overall. Some brief words capturing my summer: epic and sad road trip, adventure, family pregnancy, tension, taking care of people who should be taking care of me, international travel that included uncomfortable, yet important moments as a foreigner, France!, breath of fresh air, rejuvenation, excitement, motivation, crash and burn, shingles, strange small travels, depression, moody, jobless, hopeless, crabbing!, no motivation, thumb wound. Present: I feel like i am on the cusp, and i know Mattmo would love that. I prefer precipice, but y'know, ya gotta throw some people a bone sometimes. I have been low and I feel like I should be moving upward soon. I need to keep moving and keep searching for a job. I might need to move to the West Coast again. What has been nice (not necessarily for me) this summer is that I have been able to be here for family and speak sense into them. I have also started to refine my career goals and have focused what I think I would like to do for an advanced degree as well as a professional career. But, this hopeless job searching has been depressing leaving me feeling undesirable. Every time that I send out a resume I feel as though I just submitted on into an infinitely large waste basket. I realize the necessity of moving along despite these sentiments, but have been unable to overcome myself and my obstacles. I need something serious in my life. Ugh.

2008-06-20T23:19:00.001-04:00

I have SO much to write about...and yet, I cannot. I hope to be able to write about it all very soon and to talk in person to a few of my closests. Life is just too full right now.

2008-06-13T00:48:00.000-04:00

Not gunna lie, I dont really like life after graduation. I find myself feeling lonely, inadequate, purposeless, unmotivated, poor, and lethargically lazy. On top of it all, I keep breaking out like crazy. Is this what life holds for college graduates? Maybe I should just go back to school already. Any ideas friends? anyone?

2008-05-01T06:49:00.000-04:00

In other news...upon Catherine's advice, I started a new blog called Modus Operandi in order to make sure that Vanguard is more fashionable than other schools in our league. Also, I would like to keep my posts on this blog more serious. Hopefully that feeling is not pressure because everyone else's one here seem to be, but it would be nice to be serious some of the time. No pressure though, no pressure.

This is why Vice is so amazing; another list of sorts.

2008-04-14T04:55:00.000-04:00

I kind of wouldn't mind being a homeless Japanese lady.

So you think it's cute to whip out your little sausage roll and hold it up to a bum while you flash the camera a toothy grin? You like laughing at the homeless? You probably don't even know that you can get instant penis cancer from touching their crust-covered 49ers jackets.

Who's laughing now?

PS: You look like a German lesbian.

The best thing about giving up booze for a couple months isn't the better sleep of the lack of hangovers or saving money. It's having a wee sip of your first drink of 2008 and it being so fucking delicious you want to pop your eyeballs out of your head so you can drink them as well.

Apparently I enjoy lists.

2008-03-22T16:32:00.000-04:00

Things that I have enjoyed and will continue to enjoy until the end of my undergraduate career comes to an end:
- Karen's wedding yesterday - so fun! who has chocolate covered strawberries filled with liqueur? gross.
- Justice concert in Vegas next week! I cannot even describe how excited I am about this...
- The Senior Cruise! I am excited to eat the best fish tacos ever and relax and not think about anything for a weekend!
- ASB Palm Springs Retreat 2008! I CANNOT WAIT...best time of my life!
- JSB - and I am even the proud new owner of a Khaki suit, I will fit in well!
- Graduation - this is a given.
- Grad Parties - I will make up for all those many years that I was a prude at all of those amazing grad parties!

Things that I am not looking forward to completing before the end of the semester:
- My freakin Lit. Review for Psych Testing that was due like a month ago...
- A silly Short Term Missions Paper...also due about a month ago...
- Research Paper on Deinstitutionalization of Mental Hospitals for none other than John Wilson (however, this is due the Friday that we leave for the Senior Cruise, so the timing is great)
- Completing and Presenting our Test Manual and Design for Psych Testing

My celebrity sightings in chronological order:

2008-02-20T18:54:00.000-05:00

1. Cato Caylin
2. Susan Sullivan, aka the mom from Dharma and Greg
3. Ron Jeremy
~~4. Jael from America's Next Top Model~~

This Summer

2008-02-04T06:04:00.001-05:00

2007-09-16T23:34:00.000-04:00

i have issues. sometimes I feel like I haven't lived an interesting life because I haven't had as hard times as other people, but i am realizing that I have things that I deal with that are extreme and somehow this knowledge makes me feel normal...and all those preoccupations about living an interesting life quickly fade and knew obsessions begin.

Sing it Bowie (via Seu Jorge)

2007-08-10T01:03:00.000-04:00

Ch-ch-ch-changes.

Its a pretty shitty thing when a person you have been friends with for three or so years avoids eye contact with you at an intersection. Fuck. that. shit. I am getting so pissed and bitter about it...Although, she doesn't even really deserve my friendship. She doesn't deserve a lot of the friendships that she has more recently dissolved. You know, the type of friendship in which people actually care, unlike the friendships that you just try to out do the other friend with your experiences. Well, she HAS always has a high level of disclosure to anyone, and I mean anyone; you didn't even have to want to listen, you just had to exist. Go along, befriend totally new friends; ones that wont questions you or dare to keep your perception in check. Go along, be with someone you already dated and really hated. Go along, be pretentious. Go along, and reach down out of the high cloud of yours to 'help' Appalachian heathens with your beau who reads a lot of books on theology yet studies jazz. Just go along, because I really don't want to see you anymore.

Just a few things

2007-07-03T00:11:00.000-04:00

Emily, my best friend from Michigan called me yesterday and we had a lovely chat with her...and its times like those when I miss my Michigan friends. She also kind of convinced me to help plan our five year reunion...WTF!!! who even has a five year reunion? Oh well, i deal with that when it comes. It was just so good to talk to her, and to think, she even called me on her own initiative! Whoot!

I have been having some strange dreams lately...I AM sleeping in really really late, but still. Two nights ago I dreamed that enya died, and that I was in a relationship in the country. It was weird, but i guess those kind of dreams are. And the thing is I could not tell you who I was in a relationship with, it was blurry. Last night I had a terrible dream that my old high school principal was wrongly accused of being a child molester...sad! Mr. Morris was the best! anyways, its bittersweet because I always would like to remember my dreams, but if they're gunna make me feel this weird, they (yes, the ominous) can keep em!

On another note, I watched a man digging in our trash dumpsters today as they were on the street waiting to be picked up. It was one of those moments where you dont know how to begin to feel. So i just watched. sigh.

Things Fall Apart

2007-06-29T03:18:00.000-04:00

Last night I went to bed with the overwhelming feeling that my life was unraveling. So many are the reasons as to why I would feel like this. I have been working way more than I would like to. A lot of my spare time is dedicated to planning ASB for the upcoming year. As a result, I feel like my summer is already coming to a close. I am nearing a burnout concerning work. I am also having friend issues: I need to become a better friend to certain friends and speak up! Friends need to be told that what they are doing is not okay sometimes! Also, I am just getting the overwhelming feeling that everyone is leaving. I mean, yeah, I do have plenty on my plate to where i can replace those people with other responsibilities, but who the hell wants to do that? I think even the girls apartment might end up disbanding some time soon. Quite a few friends are up and leaving come December and I already feel quasi-depressed about it. That is not to say that I wont have any friends remaining. not at all true. Some of my best friends ever are going to be around and I am already very aware that they will be my sanity for the duration of the year and my sadness when we graduate and go our separate ways. I am afraid that I am thinking myself into a funk. Maybe a little bit of sun will help my case.

21 is nice

2007-06-10T15:55:00.000-04:00

I have been 21 for a couple of days now, and i must admit, i think this is the most noticeable birthday. You know how people always ask, "how does it feel to be [insert age]?" and you ask yourself, "am i supposed to physically feel different?" I can actually experience the benefits of being another year older, unlike 18 in that I was too juvenile to experience the world 'correctly'. Besides being 21, i want to put up some quotes from my books recently...bill bryson is a pretty funny writer, and anne lamott has her moments, but shes not hot shit....here are the quotes:

"If you ran over your head in this gridlock, you probably wouldn't even end up dead, and your hair would be all fucked up." -Anne Lamott, on traffic and her untame hair

Regarding Kmart..."Its the place you would go if you wanted to buy a stereo system for under thirty-five dollars and didn't care if it sounded like the band was playing in a mailbox under water in a distant lake."-Bill Bryson

""Well, I'll tell you one thing, honey," she said, "for a foreigner you speak English real good.""-Bill Bryson

"I read once that it takes 75,000 trees to produce one issue of the Sunday New York Times--and it's well worth every trembling leaf. So what if our grandchildren have no oxygen to breathe? Fuck "em."-Bill Bryson

"The people named the town after Oxford in England in the hope that this would persuade the state to build the university there, and the state did. This tells you most of what you need to know about the workings of the Southern mind."-Bill Bryson

Well, its been fun, but i have to go to work! peace.

The 19th of May,

2007-05-19T16:20:00.000-04:00

or, when grades are up online. I did not do that great, but, it didn't make my GPA suffer too badly. I got an A in Cognitive Psychology (wtf?), an A- in Field Practicum, a B+ in Theories/Principles of Learning, a B+ in Christian Heritage, and a B in Research Methods...who gets a B in research methods. I felt really stupid after that, but then again, I turned in all my assignments at the end of the semester, so I deserve it I guess, its just that it was so easy and everyone already knew it all. oh well. I am still at cum laude standing which is good. 3.556 baby. Plus, I dont think I'll be getting horrible grades next year, and even so, the grades i receive will effect my GPA less and less, which is amazing at this point. Meh and Eh all at the same time. And I think my parents would be pleased anyway...which is funny, because I don't think my parents actually care about my grades that much anymore. They trust me, which I find funny. I don't really even bother to tell them, but don't hide it either. Eh, whatever.

-ASB continues to haunt my mind. Should I feel apprehensive as I do? I do not know, but as I said in my previous post, I need Corri around.

-I tried to clean this place up a bit, but the damn newsreel thing sucks and isn't working well>>>>>

peace.

I am just observing my life take place

2007-05-18T16:45:00.000-04:00

well, i have been thinking about starting to write in my blog more...partly because i have a lot to write about...partly because i don't want THE entire world to know. And quite frankly, my use of ellipses is getting ridiculous. So, thank you blogger for having me, and here we go.

The thing is, i was so looking forward to this summer. I turn 21 (and i have actually held out for the most part in my consumption of drinking alcoholic beverages) and a lot of friends are staying down for summer who haven't in the past, and it is freaking summer, what's not to enjoy? But, for many reasons, this summer has been...wtf:

1) Relationships have been very strange going into summer. Not intimate relationships having to do with me of course--non-existent, is anyone surprised? There was a slew of people breaking up right before school ended [Corri and james, among others], and with that some people [Kristin and bobby] have gotten together. Its weird. not bad, but weird because that means that friendships are changing pretty radically. PLUS Corri and Dominica have been the source of much relationship information that makes me feel super uncomfortable...yes, thats right, same-sex relationship information...it is just crazy information and it almost makes me frustrated given who the people are/what their roles are on campus/how they try to cover it up.

2) Lots of my friends started to drink, which makes me uneasy. A lot of friends who have drank before got drunk for their first time/first time in years. Again, uneasiness. Here's where my problem is in regard to getting drunk if you are a Christian. I think you can be a Christian and get drunk, yes, but i still think it is ridiculous. If you are a Christian you are supposed to live in accordance with biblical standards, and one of the standards that is plainly stated is that getting drunk should be avoided. I do not understand how so many people can just overlook that. It just shouldn't be. That said, I love all of you who do, i just don't understand it. Another that said...I haven't had a ton of experience with alcohol, but when I have, it has been in moderation and have not had a desire to get drunk, but then again I would hate to be that hypocritical Christian blogger who turns 21 and then gets wasted after saying that he doesn't understand it.

3) I am getting even more involved at Vanguard. It's like the second you even think about removing yourself as much as possible while still attending school, Vanguard sucks you in. However, a lot needs to change at Vanguard, so I hope I can advocate those changes efficiently. Here's the deal. I was elected Senior Class President, wasn't sure if I wanted it, but then talked to Cristina Grace and got excited for it. Then Katie Ducy dropped out, which is completely understandable...I do not blame her for one second. So me and Grace go through the process of finding a Vice President and find an amazing one, Lindsey Rinke. Then...after I am all excited about doing Senior Class stuff and having a chilled out senior year Amanda Cooper pulls me in her office and tells me that Erin Cap (ASB VP) is going through some discipline issues and that I need to know this to be thinking about VP instead of Senior Class. okay, that stressed me out, but okay, I am glad she said something well in advance. So what ends up happening is Erin is out and I am really the only one that fulfills the requirements for the position. Ahhh, but at the same time, it was one of those things that I could not say no to because it made too much sense. So i ended up saying yes, and I have already sat down and planned out dates and more for next year's ASB. I even went up to the mountains with the ASB exec board and Cooper and Kirsten Nielsen for Exec Board retreat. NUTS! I feel like a fool almost, but I think it is because I have not even come close to being okay with my decision yet. In time Kent, in time.

4) I got a job for summer alone. That is a good thing right? yes, it is. And it is a fairly easy job too, that is good for my resume in Psychology. I am (just) a receptionist at a living center for seniors with dementia. I answer the phones, make sure residents don't escape and buzz people in and out. HOWEVER, this job really challenges what I believe about caring for people who are not able to care for themselves. For example, residents are not allowed to make phone calls, which on one hand makes sense. I need to be able to answer the phone for one, and there would be so many misdials and confusion that the resident would most likely end up agitated. One the other hand, they are so limited in the freedom that they have...like the fact that they are locked in this facility (for safety of course, but still!). This job totally challenges me.

5) Other baby reasons that I feel weird at the moment: --Im pissed that I couldn't upgrade my crappy phone to the Blackjack PDA...I need that organizer and those bastards at Cingular told me that I had to pay an extra 40 dollars a month to use that phone. Fuckers. I was so pissed, I shouldnt have to pay for email and text messages in advance, not to mention, I am on the family plan, what the hell kind of sense does that make to have minutes and a data plan that only I can use? --I only work 20 hours a week, but i work them 4 days in a row, so off to work I go for the weekend. --Im trying to get out to DC to visit the family, and to get licensed in DC...but I dont have money or time. AHHH!

Things I need: Corri, money, peace in my life, more fun adventures that dont require any thought (ie San Diego/Las Vegas gallivants).

{the best things in life are untitled}

2006-11-11T00:59:00.000-05:00

Im back...because I dont really feel want to publish this for the world to see...only a few. I guess...I guess i just dont really dont know where I belong. I think its something that I generally always feel to an extent, but feel it more intensely at certain times. Like now. Everytime I am hanging out with friends, I find myself looking at them and trying to look at myself, and trying to realize where I fit into all of it. I feel as though I dont fit in, but to an extent its because I dont want to, or cant. Its really confusing and shitty, cause its not like I can just stop talking to people. Who does that? Now, there are those with whom nothing has changed and probably nothing ever will. If you are reading this, you are more than likely to be one of those people. I dont fit into the ASB mold, I dont fit in the Psychology mold, I dont fit into the Christian mold, and I dont fit into the non-Christian mold, well where the hell am I? I think that is why I hold back so much in friendships (and relationships in general) and why I generally dont stick with the same crowd for very long. Its so frustrating though! I guess this post is evidence that I should probably seek some counsel, but last year I met with Markita, and I dont feel like that was the best route. I also sought help from the counseling center, and that did nothing for me...however, it did help some friends to realize that they could benefit from counseling too, and they have. I am glad for that, but thats not the point, the point is that I need someone who is a cross between and counselor/therapist and a mentor. sad. But seriously, the most sad part of it is that I am never going to find the time to meet with this person. Maybe if I remember, I'll bring it up to Coop on our one-on-one next time. bah!!

Bah baaah

2006-08-02T16:21:00.000-04:00

Does anybody ever feel like nothing ever works out their way/or perfectly? I mean i suppose perfection is an impossibility. But what about satisfaction? I seldom feel satisfied with my work. I feel that I should try harder most of the time...but is there enough time for that? not really. so i have this dilemma. I already feel like this next year is going to be full of settling. and i HATE IT! i hate settling! its the worst, and no one deserves it! Well, i guess trying harder never hurts anybody. Im still going to try to get the best of the best, in all situations. Its like a recent conversation me and my mom were having about health companies/the constant gardener. i mean its one thing to give something that is second best when its all you have...but i mean i think when you have the money and the means, you should only give your best...which is one of the many reasons drug companies are absolutely rediculous; they are one of the most profitable industries (which is a whole other tangent)...its just shameful...
anyways. thats my spiel. peace and love.

Summer of The Setting Sun (so far)

2006-07-27T01:19:00.000-04:00

The Food (live) - Common feat. Kanye West
King of Carrot Flowers Pt. 1 - Neutral Milk Hotel
God Moving Over the Face of the Water - Moby
Njosnavelin (The Nothing Song) - Sigur Ros
The Rainbow - The Apples in Stereo
Heart - Stars
What the Snowman Learned About Love - Stars
Romantic Comedy - Stars
Look Up - Stars
Talk (Thin White Duke Mix) - Coldplay
E-Pro - Beck
Hell Yes - Beck
Sweet Adeline - Elliott Smith
Baby Britain - Elliot Smith
Mince Meat - DangerDoom
Is It Any Wonder? - Keane
Nothing In My Way - Keane
A Bad Dream - Keane
Walnut Tree - Keane
Crystal Ball - Keane
The Three Sunrises - U2
Slow Dissolve - David Gray
Trouble - Ray LaMontagne
Little One - Beck
On Your Wings - Iron & Wine
Rebel, Rebel - Seu Jorge
After You Left - Mirah
Make It Hot - Mirah
Recommendation - Mirah
Let Forever Be - The Chemical Brothers
Jack-Ass - Beck
Gold Lion - Yeah Yeah Yeahs

2006-07-11T14:41:00.000-04:00

Bear with me: but i dont think that i have ever not understood someone more than i do now. i think i will try the perks of being a wallflower trick...but right about now i am seriously creeped out by this person. sorry for the ambiguity, but i feel that it is necessary. yikes!

Soul meets Body

2006-06-22T16:14:00.000-04:00

I have so many huge ideas for publicity next year it is rediculous (see pic) and therefore am excited about it. I am going to try my hardest to get everything that students deserve (the best), but i have a feeling i am going to have to settle on stuff...maybe i am having dilusions of grandeur about it. probably, no one could suppress what is stirring inside of me, its like i was meant for this. Hopefully it will get me to where i want to be in the future. YAY!

This will be an everlasting love

2006-05-12T06:38:00.000-04:00

Tonight was quite the night...i dont usually write seemingly meaningless blogs on here, but i want to remember this night forever. So I helped plan a little shindig for a friend who turned 23 tonight, and here is how the night played out...

-A random guy (named George) showed up at like 10:45 because he was looking up events on myspace and found it... all because i sent out a few invites to friends...i am now considering getting rid of my myspace.
-Me and Dj Craigtron made one of the best mixes ever for the night...and everyone liked it.
-I walked in to Teddy in his room just sitting by himself...and it was really funny.
-There was really wierd tension between some people from the sexual past (one of which we dont really know how he got invited).
-Someone from school that I totally didnt expect to drink did, and got drunk.
-One drunk girl (of whom I have met on a couple occasions) decided to try and take advantage of me...it was one of the wierdest situations of my life. She said she was going to die, so I was taking her to go sleep somewhere and she pounced. She wrapped her legs around my leg and wouldnt let me leave. she said she wanted me to lay with her for 5 minutes, and then i tried to escape and she grabbed my leg, and i finally escaped through the patio door after telling her that i was really freaked out.
-The drunk girl from school was kissing a guy that used to go to our school, and Im not gunna lie, I felt a little defensive/hurt, because I think she likes me, and in some minute way, i kind of (once) desired to reciprocate those feelings, i guess. At least that is what i have deduced so far.
-The proweling drunk girl got naked and in the hot tub with lewis and a girl from church that knew the birthday girl.
-The same prowess apologized for trying to jump my bones and told me she had a crush on me, but didnt want to tell anyone.
-To top it all off, I was a DD and it was great. I wouldnt have wanted to drive better people home.

All in all, I love my friends, and I love my decision making abilities. I had a wonderfully awkward night.
Creepy/fantastic/wierd/awesome.

The Latest and Greatest

2006-04-22T17:34:00.000-04:00

What God Does in Her Spare Time.
BY JAMIE KILSTEIN AND ALLISON KILKENNY
- - - -
Minesweeper
Slipper shopping
Sudoku
Baking
Practical jokes on James Dobson
Watching the news and crying

The Byrds are Singing

2006-03-26T00:53:00.000-05:00

There is so much change going on, that I almost don't know what to do. I have so many feelings going on right now, that I don't know which one to express at times. It honestly feels almost like I am starting a new life. Creepy/Wonderful. Even my brain is being stretched, as well as my finances, time, worldview, life. And all I want to do in these moments is sit back, outside of myself, and watch me grow and change. Unfortunately, I cannot do that. I need to stick around. This reminds me of one of my favorite writers, who wrote a short story about a boy who was afraid to go cliff jumping and to make a splash. Thanks friends for helping me grow.

2006-03-25T01:54:00.000-05:00

When given an experience of people ignoring me a friend said, "Maybe your just invisible and you dont know it." It made me sad, and not because she said it, just because that would be a sad situation to be in. Im gunna go cry my self to sleep to Puff the Magic Dragon.

East Egg Cobblestone

2006-03-16T16:29:00.000-05:00

Yesterday as my mother and I walked down the near-19th century sidewalk we stumbled upon a daffodil. This daffodil was so perfect, and mind you I do not normally use the word perfect, that it didn't even look real. Then I looked up at the houses, at the sky, at the trees, and at the prosperity, in every meaning of the word. DC is such a strange place. I think about my future and how i would adore living in an urban dwelling. Chicago, Boston, Seattle, San Francisco, Omaha. I can't even fathom it. So then I stopped thinking about it, and then quickly thought of how a simple, beautiful daffodil can take your mind places.

A Tisket a Tasket

2006-02-27T02:31:00.000-05:00

As i wrote the short list of the
things that i missed the list didn't
seem complete. as i pondered
later, i realized that the
list kept going even after the keys
stopped clicking, even after i
left the computer lab, even
after i stopped thinking about it.
I realize now that the list has
created something in me of
almost unbearable, un-
ignorable proportions. I realized that
what i missed wasn't something
that could ever possibly be captured by
pen or ink, or by a silly font. I
realized that what i missed above all was
life itself.

ENGL 300

2006-02-20T15:53:00.000-05:00

brake lights trailing without ever ceasing
like a cellist, the sound so soothing
if New York, the city that never sleeps,
then Chicago, the city to a beat.
In summer, the sun beats and the lake speaks
come winter, wind gusting, our homes spark heat
Enter fall, providing pea coats and wheat
the Midwest gem shines rain, hard times, and sleet.
Yet, Chicago being restless and young
give way to chaos, hustle and peace none
the L always shaking, roaring aloud
and people running, running about.

Beauty in the breakdown goes the phrase,
oh my soul, chicago, my refuge place.

nocturnal emissions

2006-02-14T18:43:00.000-05:00

i dreampt about gasoline last night and awoke feeling more refreshed than i have felt in a long time.

Im Really Hot

2006-02-08T18:05:00.000-05:00

ratatat
Originally uploaded by kentbechillin.

Oh how i love them so...they are my favorite band ever at the moment. My song of right now is their remix of Missy Elliott's Im Really Hot...so good. A little update in my life...so last week, you know the one with all the exams, quizzes, and scenes, went over really well...and for that i am really glad. I got a 97 on my lit. perspectives quiz, a 96 on my developmental exam, an 84 on my soc. psych exam (worst class ever), a 96 on my abnormal psych exam, and a 112 on my stats exam...woohoo! and me and corri just did our final scene presentation for acting. I feel somewhat free...although i have a little bit o work to do for the remainder of the week. All is well on my part, even though I havent seen my counselor for a normal appt. yet. she is really flakey. peace everyone.

[A Glitch in the System]

2006-02-05T15:17:00.000-05:00

Firstly...it is really nice for this past week to be over...I can let out a huge sigh of relief, 2 quizzes, 4 exams, and 2 presented scenes later, I am still alive...and i think i did really well on all of them, I got a 97 on a quiz, and a 96 and 84 on two exams so far. Its nice. I have been having the strangest deja vu moments lately. The other morning I had a dream that my room mate was putting on my pants, and I was telling him they were mine, but he didn't care, so I went to find my RA who wasn't there, and then went to another RA, Brianne, who isn't an RA, and asked for help, and she could give me none. The funny thing about this dream is...my room mate did take my pants once, and my RA really is never there. The crazy thing about this dream was, I told Brianne, and she said, HEY! I applied to be one next year. ::wierd:: The other wierd thing was that I was chatting/coffeeing with some friends and we were talking about someone in the play we had just seen being like a mortician or the grandpa on the munsters or something. The next day I got on the computer to see the report that the grandpa on the munsters had died. I was a little freaked out, but I am no prophet or anything, so that makes it even more scary. All this life stuff makes me want to go 'home' to DC. shalom.
[EDIT] : Eminent Domain is a bitch, and so is the US government. I think I should move away more and more. I should just be cliche, move to Italy, and become Catholic...but then I dont think I could do that...peace all.

bust a cap

2006-02-01T18:34:00.000-05:00

bust a cap
Originally uploaded by kentbechillin.

Well...here it goes. I am halfway through, quite possibly, the week of hell. i have two more exams tomorrow, and then im home free. In other news, I officially have spring break plans! My mother and I booked a flight to DC! I am pretty excited about that, seeing as how there is much to see and do on the eastern coast of the united states. Henceforth, I will more than likely be seeing corrigan, michelle, monica (all in Jersey), and the possibility of a Kristi (in Philly). Anyways, I think it will be refreshing, seeing as how it is a beautiful place, it might in fact be cherry blossom season, and my mother tells me it has been a very mild winter, so it might be nice weather by then. All things considered, this week hasn't been all that bad. PS, i was thinking about applying for the position of Director of Publicity for Activities Board...although i dont know how that'll go. We will see.

Hail Mary

2006-01-29T21:24:00.000-05:00

my first stencil from a picture
Originally uploaded by kentbechillin.

All that searching and concentrating on stencil graffiti last night inspired me to do art, so i printed some pictures and made a stencil of mary, its cool and creepy all the same, but its a good start to stenciling. Tasha Leigh did the most amazing stencil of MLKJ, i wonder if it was because she was using her scalpel or if she is really amazingly artistic, i dont fully know her yet, so we will see in time. So i decided that i would indeed take a picture of mary to share...and i will leave you with this.

Assimilation in Action

2006-01-28T18:29:00.000-05:00

Banksy, oh Banksy. Do you ever get the feeling that you have stumbled upon something on purpose? Cant say that i havent felt that in the past 24 hours. The Bear told me to check out this website on Gracie's facebook, but before I did, i was looking at graffiti and stumbled onto the site. Then i put two and two together and was amazing and felt a sence of something bigger than myself. I love stencils and stenciling, so much so that i have just printed out a bunch of potential stencils and am going to try my hand at it. Love it love it. I think this is my favorite work by Banksy, althought they are all uniquely incredible. I love it that graffiti (which is illegal in itself) is the medium in which people with something to say, mostly politically speaking, say it. Its ironic because graffiti has become somewhat obsolete and purposeless...and yet, is it now? Thank you Neck Face, Banksy, and other underground graffiti voices for doing what you do best. I think i may have found my life's passion.

Enter Sandman

2006-01-25T00:23:00.000-05:00

I have always wanted a blogger account for a long as I can remember blogs. I do not know yet what I will use this for, but Im sure its purpose will become revealed to me sooner or later. But for now, I will sit, and tinker with this site until it becomes everything it can and is meant to be.